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Your friend who gave you this advice is spot-on! a lot of stuff makes more sense to buy once you have the kid. we waited…and i asked for a lot of gift certificates to BrUS or target so we could have the flexibility.

We bought a crib once he was ready for one. don’t buy a drop-down one becaues they are about to become illegal if they haven’t already.My mothering law  gave us her old pack-n-play. those are great. you won’t use them that much, but they are good travel beds. we actually used it as another ‘transitional bed’ after the bassinet and before the crib. sleep inth same room as your baby for at least 4-6 months. it’s so much easier on everyone, including baby. My husband slept in another room for awhile once he returned to work (with my first), but this way he got continuous sleep. and i made up for lost sleep at night by napping during the day. well, at least i tried. i’m on zoloft which keeps me up!

Baby carriers are the best invention. i have 3:” moby wrap”, some scandinavian sling, and “ergo baby”. the more you carry your baby on you, the less gripey they are. don’t get one of those carriers where the baby faces out (away from you). i’ve read that babies get too overstimulated that way, esp newborns.

Other advice: all my advice is just my advice and you are allowed to say “no way, jose”. don’t let anyone think they know more than you because only you will be the master of your own child. and so you know what’s right.

Oh – and we used cloth diaper service at first (with our first) but then switched to “earths best” diaper after 2 months. my experience is the cheaper the diaper, the more chemicals in it, and the more red/irritated their butt gets. sometimes “super absorbant” isn’t the end-all/be-all.

Oh – a good, strange place to get parent opinions or feedback….is the reviews on baby items in “babies r us” web site.i swear, i have learned a lot just researching items by reading the reviews. a lot of times, even if i’m standing right in the middle of a babies r us, i won’t buy anything until i’ve gone home and read the reviews on their website.

Whew! i never write this much! why am i not napping? it’s nap time right now for both kids right now!

Hey, congratulations!

Our situation is somewhat unusual, since we spend so much time on the road and away from home, so take it for what it’s worth, but it might not be the same as for you!

For the first six months of  my sons life, when we were home, he slept in a bassinet right beside my bed. I really wanted him close to me, and it made it SO much easier in the middle of the night to do feedings, then put him right back down to sleep. When he was about 1 or 2 months old, we figured out how to nurse him while I was lying sideways in bed, and often we’d both drift back to sleep that way, so everyone got a lot more sleep that way. I know some people are really not comfortable with babies in the bed with them, but it worked for us. Since we were on the road so much, I used the Baby Bjorn portable crib, which is expensive, but packs up very light and is easy to take on the road, compared to a Pack and Play. I would put his crib beside my bed, same as the bassinet was at home. I do think it’s hard on the back to use the travel crib full-time as you do have to strain your back getting them in and out when they’re small! It was a great solution for us, and we trained him at just a few months old to go to sleep on his own, by putting him down in his crib awake. He knew we were nearby, and learned quickly to go to sleep on his own, and soon would do it even if we left the room.

At home, I ended up buying a full set – a crib, wardrobe, and dresser, which I use as the changing table. The nice thing about it is the crib transformed into a toddler bed (we just switched it) and when he outgrows that, it turns into a lovely headboard and footboard for a full-size adult bed. It was a splurge, but I bought the floor model on final sale, and it will last him to adulthood – it doesn’t look like “baby” furniture so much, and I didn’t like the idea of disposable, cheap baby furniture so much, so I bought it with the idea that it’s permanent and long-lasting furniture.

I second the baby sling idea. They were indispensable. We used a Baby Bjorn when he was really, really tiny, but the one we liked the best and still use is the Ergo Organic one. It is really versatile and MUCH easier on the back than Baby Bjorn when they get big.

We liked the Bumbo chair a lot, but it might depend on the baby. Michael is a pretty calm boy, so he liked to sit in it, starting at about 4 months, and we would sit him with us at the table at mealtimes and he would play or watch us, even when he was too young for solids. This way he got used to mealtimes and sitting still for them. The other thing he really liked was a Jolly Jumper. When I was alone with him, I could attach the jumper to the bathroom doorway, put him in, and he would happily jump away while I got a quick shower in – so for me it was indispensable! I never missed a shower since he was born, thanks to that thing, and it was easy to toss in the suitcase. He also liked the exersaucer a lot. He hated the baby swing, but tons of babies love it. It really depends on the baby – see if you can borrow things at first from friends and try them out. I didn’t even know what an exersaucer was, but a friend gave us theirs and he loved it. We also had a little baby chair that he napped in a lot in those first few months – I could put it right beside my desk or in the kitchen and keep an eye on him while still getting work done. That was great.

We babyproofed ourselves, and only as we went along. Most important for us were gates on the stairs and the things you plug up the electric sockets with, but Michael crawled and walked very late, so we didn’t have too much to worry about.

My best advice would really be to do your research about the birth process and breastfeeding/formula feeding, but also be prepared to roll with the punches! You can never quite predict what will happen so sometimes plans have to change. We hired a doula, and my husband was skeptical at first, but he would tell anyone now that it was the best money we ever spent! We also took childbirth classes with her, and it’s good to be aware that if you take the classes through a hospital, they will be heavily biased towards the hospital’s ways and wishes for a birth, not necessarily neutral or what might be best for you. I am the book type, so I read about 15-20 different books about everything and was glad to have done so. We ended up with a very excellent hospital birth and a healthy baby son, and that was all that really mattered!

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I had a crib, a pack and play, bassinet, etc for my first child. We never used them at all. She slept in bed with me after about a month. With second I didn’t even own a crib. We did have a pack and play that has a bassinet built in, but we really didn’t use it either. I know co-sleeping doesn’t work for everyone, but I can’t imagine making my babies sleep away from me.

As far as products that aren’t worth buying, I’d put the Bumbo seat at the top of the list. We had one for second child and she was always either too small, too wiggly, or too big. I felt like it was an expensive purchase (around $40) for something that could be used for less than one month total.

You also should not buy toys that attach to the car seat, after market car seat pads, replacement car seat covers that aren’t made by the same manufacturer, or the warm covers that you have to put the car seat straps through. None of those products are safe. You can use the warm cover that goes over the seat like a shower cap, because it does not interfere with the way the straps work. Also, you can’t put a baby in a thick coat in the car seat. In cold weather you should just put them in a thin fleece one piece or fleece pants and jacket, which will keep them warm but won’t cause the straps to be too loose.

One thing I would recommend buying is a good quality baby carrier / sling. It is much easier to put a little baby in a carrier (where they can sleep and nurse easily) than pushing around a huge stroller all the time. It’s worth buying a stroller too because there will be times you’re glad you have it, but using a sling made my life so much easier when they were babies.

We did not have professional baby-proofing. If you are going to do it yourself, I’d recommend getting down on your hands and knees to explore the areas the baby would be. You will find things that you wouldn’t think of at your normal level. Definitely attach any tall cabinets, dressers, etc to the walls so they can’t tip over if he pulls up on them. When the baby gets a little older you will need door knob locks to keep him out of rooms he shouldn’t be in or to keep him from getting outside.

I read a ton of baby books when I was pregnant with my oldest, but there is really nothing like having your own baby and figuring out what works best for the two of you. The best piece of advice I’ve ever received is that the baby will not know if you make a mistake here and there.

If you’re planning to breastfeed, it is worth reading some books or talking to lactation consultants before the baby is born. When you’ve got a hungry newborn and you’re sleep deprived, you won’t be up to searching for the answers you need. If you’re not planning to breastfeed, I’d recommend doing some research on the benefits of breastmilk vs. formula.

I don’t know if you’re interested in cloth diapers, but we really enjoyed using them. They’re much easier to deal with than what you might think. If you have any questions about them, just let me know.

Also, I am a huge advocate of extended rear-facing in the car. In most states you can legally still turn them forward-facing at 12 months and 20 pounds, but the AAP recommends at least 2 years old now. My second will be three years old in February and she is still very comfortably rear-facing. We will probably have to turn her around next spring when she outgrows the limits of her car seat. It is something so simple that you can do that can make your child so much safer. If you want more info, feel free to ask me any questions. There’s also a lot of info you can find online, including some pretty good videos on youtube.

Also… I would not buy many bottles, pacifiers, or formula before the baby is born. Some babies can only use certain ones, so I’d wait and see what he needs before stocking up.

Good Luck!!

Have a few question on products to parents of babies and toddlers and would love everyone feedback. As some of you may be aware I am pregnant. It was planned just happened faster than doctors or us thought it would.

I am starting to research products to buy and would like your advice. I only know of a few people with youngsters and am limited for people to turn to except for you folks. So thanks in advance for your time.

1) Does one need a wooden crib these days or do people just use the portable cribs? Or is it worth owning both? What is everyone preferences?

2) What products are not worth buying, because at the end there is better ways to or other products to use? Such as portable crib versus wooden crib.

3) Did you guys get professionals to come in and baby proof the house or did it yourself

4) how did you learn the ins and outs of your first baby. I was a nanny and did alot of babysitting but now am a bit nervous, we have no family in the area and worried if there are skills I am missing.

5) Any advice you give a new parent you wish you had on products, or parenting……spill the beans. I am due April 28th so have some time, but also would like to learn from others rather than just books.

Thanks again for participating in this open discussion.